Can't Give It Away...

A few years back I tried to sell, then give away my darkroom equipment/supplies: Omega C760 enlarger, 2 El Nikkor lenses, beloved Time-O-Lite P-72 w/toggle switch, etc, etc...)- it wasn't easy! Ultimately, was happy to give it all away to a private individual who seemed they were really going to use it...

Now, I'm trying to donate my photobook collection to a credible, reputable arts organization or institution and... am having an even more difficult time! I wrote to around a dozen people with considerably more substantial photo connections than moi, just asking for suggestions- and... Crickets, Nada, Zip! Some of these monographs are worth (even used) a couple hundred each, a select few, even more. I'd like to see them go somewhere they would actually be used and appreciated. And I like to think it's a small but impressive collection...

TWIMC- I've amassed a small but fairly impressive collection of photography books- we're talking about approx 500 monographs, mostly documentary/straight/art slant- a small sampling:

Bechers, Gilden, Koudelka, TH Chi, Maier, Cohen, Wessel, Roma, Joakim Eskelson, R Bram, B. Owens, Eggleston, Wayne Lawrence, Nachtwey (Inferno), Dijkstra, Davidson, Webb, Parr, Taryn Simon, Soth, Ballen, Shelby Lee Adams, Sieff, Mermelstein, Friedlander, Winogrand, J. Davies, Klett, W/O Sanctuary,  The Polaroid Book, Killing Fields, Mark Steinmetz, Meiselas, M E Mark, Salgado, Goldberg and a host of other BIG and many smaller names...  You get the picture.

I would like to donate said books (all in V Good to EXC Cond), if you you know where they could actually be used as an active learning resource (eg- educational institute, organization in need).The one caveat is that I am not a man of means (live in San Francisco)- so we'd have to figure out the best way to move said collection from point A to point B...

 

If interested, I could supply a full inventory upon request.

Thank you for your time and consideration,

Stan B.

Presently, I'm in a holding pattern as far as what to do- hoping I'll have an AHAA!!! moment when I finally figure out why I didn't think of that before. Or, I may just be forced to sell them them individually... and make a couple of k.

An Absolute Joy...

 To Watch, An Absolute Joy To Listen To...

Getting Schooled

Pompous 'Conservative Intellectual' (talk about an oxymoron) gets utterly schooled by a master. Ol' Bill thought he could raise his eyebrows and flutter his eyelids (not to mention threaten outright violence) as usual in order to further impress and intimidate, or in this case disguise, how he is thoroughly outclassed, outmaneuvered and just plain owned! Small wonder Noam was... never invited back.

U Wanna Conspiracy?

Photo: © Stan Banos

 "NASA's lasers sent to the brain aka micro chips, to force fatigue, so Whites can out run Black children and be stronger."

Imaginative, bat shit crazy, and... funny as hell if ya ask me! Notably, no one has any problem quickly dispatching this particular "conspiracy theory" as the unique working of an obviously mentally ill passerby- and yet... forty percent of this nation rabidly embraces equally certifiably insane inanities concerning a "stolen election," with no actual proof* other than their most fervent of masturbatory fantasies. 

Nobody would have any problem calling the guy who wrote the above sick, and yet we now have almost half the nation embracing a cabal of quasi political/religious cultists that operate on a fascist belief system based on loyalty, absurdity and white supremacy. We once laughed at he who told the govmint to keep outta our Medicare (those outside the US of A- the "govmint" runs Medicare). His fellow cultists, every bit as (mis)informed as he, now stand poised to overtake that govmint- and all its citizens...

*When asked in court if Mr. Guliani (he who leaks motor oil from the font of his knowledge) was presenting a fraud case- Mr. Guliani replied...
"NO."  Case Closed.

Refresh...

 At your leisure... and remember- none of these people actually exist!

But you're not going to convince me otherwise that I haven't interacted with a number of them personally
(and some of 'em are real SOB's...).

A New Home/A Compromised Life

Freedom First!

 

 

 

Having your own place when your twenty is an ideal situation of novelty, excitement and promise. Having your own place when turning senior, devoid of wife and pet is, at best, a compromised situation. One makes the best of what is left, or one devolves into the darkness. 

I concentrate on my avocation, continue to support myself and carry on the best I can, committed to enjoying what may yet still come in the years remaining. I still got a European vacation (maybe two) left, and while I don't at all mind that solo, alas, road trips are best shared with someone you enjoy.

5in Tall- kid U not!

I'm fairly taken with my micro studio apt- and ya gotta love that 'view' beyond the parking lot! Any way ya cut it, a vast improvement over the storage room with a sink I was previously holed up in. And having mastered the art of the Moka pot, I've finally learned how to make a seriously delicious cup of java! I actually go to bed thinking of the coffee I'm gonna make myself the next morning. It's such a wonderfully traditional and analog art that's become a very practical and suitable substitute for the tactile, meditative process of developing my own film... and tastes a helluva lot better too! I even get a kick outta hauling my bed outta the closet- less than 5 minutes to set up, less than 5 to disappear. Looks like I'll never have the patio I always dreamed of, but that dream always came along with a newspaper, and those too now belong well in the past...

 

One Year...

Photo: © Stan Banos

Been a year now since The Wife and I went our separate ways. I suppose it's been... "a learning experience." I used to think, that at very least, I'd be fortunate enough not to end up that embittered old guy at the end of the bar going on about his bitch of an ex wife- no matter how funny his quips might be.

When together, I thought us invulnerable to the common faux pas that doom most couples. And no matter how bad the day, I always knew I had her (and our trusty one eyed cat) to come home too. I considered myself one pretty lucky guy!

Early in our relationship, she once said that if we let our differences define our relationship, all would soon be over- sage advice, advice I took to heart. And yet, towards the end, every time I disagreed or thought otherwise, it was but another point against me. How it got there, I'm not at all sure...

Not to say I'm faultless by any means. I could have said, and showed and demonstrated just how much she truly meant to me a lot more often, in a lot more ways. I got lazy, complacent- understandable perhaps, but not without consequence, and inexcusable nonetheless. People ultimately deserve better, I needed to make the effort.

That said, and acknowledged, it was very much a two way street. Even had I made the extra necessary effort, as I well should have- she wanted out of San Francisco. Can't say I much blame her, the state this town is in, the very disparity of its bipolar existence.

But at my age, my options are now considerably more limited, my economics even more so. So much for "better or worse," so much for growing old together...

If I'm Completely Honest...

Right now, we're still (still!) in the early stages where the Titanic is limping away from the ice... called Deep Denial. No way this boat gonna sink- UNSINKABLE! But the water gonna gush in, deck gonna list... Ship Gonna Sink!

Gotta admit, I'm gonna miss the guy- God, I'm gonna miss 'em!

PS- And as #51 more than amply demonstrates, give credit where credit is due-
the guy had NO boundaries... NONE!!!

Hungover?

The (Decades Long) Hangover...                   Photo: © Stan Banos

Enjoy the celebration yesterday? Feeling a tad... hungover?  No doubt at least in part because of Human Flotsam Like This, and the above, and that despite the marginal move towards sanity by a small majority of Americans, the other half is not going away, and is now more aggrieved and belligerent than ever. I certainly wouldn't be surprised by some very ugly shoot 'em ups by said faction on behalf of their forever wronged and assumedly entitled cult leader leading up to, during and after the upcoming inauguration.  

Thankfully, I am looking forward to: a POTUS whose countless aides and underlings will not have to interpret, reinterpret and set into readily understandable language what he really meant to say (Or as they themselves are so fond of telling certain people- "Speak English- or go back where you came from!")- only to have it (re)reversed the following day, week, month into the lie or disinformation it always was. I'll take an occasional stutterer over an habitual liar any given day of the year...

No longer will I have to slap myself upside the head each and every time I see, hear or read yet another outrage that HE was freely allowed to get away with, without the slightest of consequence: bragging about grabbing, boasting of his ability to shoot people with impunity, mocking those with disabilities, inciting violence at rallies, calling a newscaster a murderer, calling the military "losers and suckers," choosing Russian Intel over American, and just constantly making up the wildest, craziest, fuckin' shit your Mama ever did hear- Windmills cause cancer! Anyone of which would have had Obama lynched on the White House lawn.

But... No one really knows what will happen next. And though I wish him all the luck, Congenial Joe's gonna get blocked at every turn by Moscow Mitch, same as it ever was. Will the Repubs continue their meteoric nosedive towards fascist insanity without their spearhead at the helm? And what, Oh What won't free agent Trump be willing to trade in the way of national secrets to make his life easier, or use as leverage to avoid The Big House? 

The head just throbs. See ya's at... The Concession Speech!

WHY?

It still does, just a little less come 1/20/2021.            Photo: © Stan Banos

 

Why does it always take the needless deaths of thousands for such desperately needed change to occur? Usually, such wantonly sacrificed deaths occur on the far away battlefield- this time, it was right here at home! And the person most responsible even made it a point to spread his callous, self serving policies of death and indifference to his very supporters... who eagerly reveled in their own endangerment. 

This was a man who had known criminal ties and associates throughout his business career, a man whose plethora of failed businesses were frequently in court paying fines that saved him from jail sentences. This was a man whose innate insecurity and emotional (in)stability was such that he continued to insist well beyond any rational discourse that his inauguration crowd was larger than the previous President's- despite the indisputable and overwhelming evidence to the contrary. That petty display of infantile emotion and magical thinking alone was more than ample proof that this man was prone to a terminal and irrational thought process hardly conducive to sentient, responsible leadership. It was the same childlike irrationality that fueled his naked and life long: racism, duplicity, and narcissism; the same nonsensical mindset capable of uttering that windmills caused cancer and that Mexico would pay for it's own involuntary isolation. And-make-no-doubt... Americans would have enthusiastically (s)elected this unabashed criminal yet again- if not for those sacrificial deaths!

Finally, despite the much promised wailing and gnashing of teeth by he who feels perpetually wronged, we will now be soon rid of this all too human of monsters, and hopefully witness an almost endless array of perp walks in New York courtrooms that will culminate in the long term incarceration of one desperate and balding senior criminal (and his family cronies). We have  thankfully been spared an additional four year onslaught of "the worst is yet to come-" pray we do not suffer the deranged attacks of domestic terrorists unwilling to accept the demise of their cult leader. His remaining months will be punishment enough and we will continue to suffer the residual hangover of his criminal enterprise (SCOTUS) for many a year to come.

All said and done, this is but a return to the status quo of a century past... At best, the next four years will begin to address the massive harm done to our: environment, citizenry and relationships throughout the world. Only then will we commence that rarest of opportunities in American history- effectively confronting the existential challenges we already face in a new century.

V-O-T-E!!!

Photo: © Stan Banos

It's well past time to get this deranged, P-O-S, Racist Mother Fucker outta The White House and into a pardon free NY jail house where he and his entire crime family should have been quite some time ago...