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| Photos: © Stan Banos This is what I wanna feel... |
As if we ain't bent outta shape enough these days with this goddang pandemic, now we gotta worry about when Trump's unhappy army of delusional asshats are gonna bomb or shoot some shit up somewhere, sometime just because...
This is what I mostly feel.
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| Cardboard cut out vows to fellate wax figure. |
After an ever so small glimmer of possible light in the US Congress directly after the Right Wing Republican Insurrection on the US Capitol inspired by our crazed former POTUS, Republicans in Congress are now doubling down on their favorite fall back position... All Out CRAZY! And that includes not one, but two Congressional female QANON gun nuts- one who was formerly all in on executing Nancy Pelosi. And let's not forget the guy who actually tried to accompany his penile substitute directly into Congress (before trying to hand it off to someone who definitely did not want to touch it). Lindsey What Side Will I Take Today Graham is back stroking Trump's... ego, as is Cruz, as is Gaetz, McConnell, McCarthy, etc, etc, etc.
The Law and Order Party has long... forgotten: the violence of their supporters (supporters they incited), the fact that their loyal leader failed to pardon any of them (let alone march with them as he promised), and of course, the deaths that resulted. It's all okey dokey when 'patriots' kill police.
And let's not forget that people like Cruz, McConnell and Graham once called out Trump for what any conscious twelve year old could readily recognize. Instead of ridding themselves once and for all of the undistilled ignorance, insanity and blatant criminality that this man brought to Wash, DC now that he's been legally banished- they instead cling for very life to that one person who legitimized and gave life to vanquishing all their childhood fears, fears once again set free to lurk everywhere beyond the protective shelter of his spray on, orange aura.
Meanwhile... sanity strives to be heard:
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| Photo: © Stan Banos |
I'm not the kind to make New Year's Resolutions, but I do make time to take stock and ponder what lies ahead... Last year was actually pretty productive photographically; after the novelty of the lock down(s), mid year protests picked up the slack- photo ops based on the aftermath of people's pain and loss. But then, isn't that the basis of most photojournalism on any given year?
Of course, this bungled fiasco of a pandemic that was left to fester unabated could have been shortened, had we adopted some kind of science based nationwide program instead of the patchwork, devil may care, incoherent guidelines we semi adopted into our herd mentality of contradiction. And it's almost surreal that someone as myself, living on the economic borderline of uncertainty in the city supreme of financial inequity and inequality, has thus far managed to remain whole while so many above my station have folded. How much longer can this unnoticed crack of sustenance sustain me? But then, uncertainty is the current lingua franca...
Despite how bad 2020 was, 2021 probably won't be that much more ebullient, at least not the first half- and let's not forget the domestic terrorism yet to come. Hopefully, the vaccine (with all its uncertainty) will, in fact, come through and help- the economy then follow and normalcy gradually ensue. Shit, after all, my productive years on this mortal coil are now officially limited!
A coupla bad years- true that! But many of us (fortunately) won't be around for the full onslaught of global climate change: massive famines, droughts and floods, increased pandemics, wholesale mass migrations, global desertification, stronger storms, increased global conflicts and a slew of other shit we can't even begin to imagine at present. That series of upcoming plagues will span... generations, and the recovery- generations more.
I knew that Henry Louis Aaron went through hell when he approached The Babe's record, but when you heard him say that he'd actually have to think twice about whether it was worth it- his tone left little doubt that it wasn't. The stress of the record alone was enough- ask a guy called Maris. But it was the constant kidnapping and death threats to him and his family that obliterated what should have been the proudest, happiest days of his life. It was the sheer, naked hatred of racism that made it... "the worst two years of my life."
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| Photo: © Stan Banos |
The singular Nightmare may be over, but the terror still remains... Trump's racists tools and outright fools who value feeling over reality are still very much amongst us- and they're ticked off, well armed and crazy as hell. Trump has fueled their dormant outrage and lust for wishful thinking into a frenzy for four long years, and they ain't going back into dormancy until he admits he... LOST- and he ain't ever doing that! Hardcore Fundamentalists do not voluntarily join the family of man and they're gonna be out there for quite some time, hundreds of Timothy McVeigh Wannabes- plotting and scheming to overthrow... or kill as many as possible in their dementedly triumphant death throes.
How did we arrive here, how did we achieve this pinnacle of insanity- how did we get to the very point where facts are interchangeable and reality a voluntary elective? We were told to beware and fear the long haired, Leftist freaks and Commies- surely they would be the death of us all! Who believes or even remembers that now?
YO, QANON!?! You wanna conspiracy? How 'bout one where our own govmint tried to purposely dumb us all down to shit- to the point where so many would actually believe the insane inanities you espouse? One that trashed our Public School system once all them Blacks got in, chucked tuition free university systems, fed us mindless infotainment, denied us a living wage, and made it impossible for lower middle class families to survive without a multitude of concurrent jobs? A Right Wing Conspiracy that dumbed us down to a nether world where "alternative facts" and wishful thinking could surpass reality itself!
When Reagan came, he was not only free to label ketchup a vegetable, he could already appoint heads of government committees those very people that had pledged their entire careers to the destruction of said committees! When W brought in fellow Evangelicals to elect dad, even Arch Conservative of Conservatives, none other than Barry Freakin' Goldwater himself was looking around wondering who all the speaking in tongues crazies were that had infiltrated his Grand Ole Party. And by the time we got to W himself, well, he declared war on someone who had absolutely NOTHING to do with 9/11- and we all stood up and... CHEERED!!!
Yeah, we fell for it hook, line and sinker! Cause we were already that freakin' DUMB. We had a dumber than dirt POTUS who cost us a few thousand American lives, a few hundred thousand innocent civilian Iraqi lives, and a coupla cool trillion dollars that helped launch this country into economic free fall...
We had finally reached rock bottom basement; but wait, wait... there's more! After all, "Intelligence has its limits, while stupidity has none." After we got some Black dude to save our economic ass, then sent him packing back to Kenya (where he was born), we got serious yet again, showed what we had really become and what we could really achieve by getting back on track and digging up the brand new sub basement to end all Presidential sub basements- The Honorable Combover Don!
In a matter of a few decades we managed to successfully trash a nation that reached for (and touched) the moon and firmly grounded it in the filth of its own duplicitous lies, self deception and greed. And we ain't finished yet, uh-uh, we're gonna keep digging, keep sabotaging that foundation till this whole grand experiment comes tumblin' on down. Only then will we all be truly free to revel in our fave conspiracy, blame our choicest minorities, fondle our favorite firearm, and claim- Victory! Same as it ever was...
PS- Oh yeah, and Dems cried foul, and went in for the ride...
People of Color were allowed to live in viable communities where leadership, self reliance and productivity were allowed to flourish and propagate? Oh, something like this...
Back in the day, used to love going to clubs and dancing, whenever the music demanded, which wasn't often in my case. And this is, this is, what I (let me be clear...) aspired to- some eclectic mix of in check, syncopated cool with all out, free form frenzy. Of course, I doubt if I ever achieved it, but it was fun trying- almost as much fun as watching someone who can, and does, and goes well beyond... Not to mention it's nice to get the mind off the current stuff, if only for a sec. And if ya liked this tune, try...
So was this 'patriot' gonna use his gun to defend his fellow Congressmen from the crowd he purposely helped incite? Or... was he going to turn it on them when his fellow insurgent traitors breached their safe place? Inquiring minds wanna know... Was 1/06 an inside job? Did she spot the in house moles in action?
Addendum: Holey Moley!
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| All Photos: © Bruce Haley |
During the course of the 16 years and 3 iterations of this blog, I've been sent a handful of books, literally one-handful. Not a complaint, just a statement of fact, and I'm grateful at that. Recently, Bruce Haley notified me very much out of the blue that he was sending me his latest, and being a fan, was anxious to have and hold. And then, it occurred to me, what if, what if I... errr... didn't like it? I remembered world famous conflict photographer Don McCullin upon retiring from that particular scene, took to shooting rather serene and romantic shots of his homeland. A healing, wholesome process for him I'm sure- that he's more than rightfully earned, just not my cup of tea. So when I heard that Mr. Haley, also a renowned conflict photographer, was photographing the land and area of his youth, my anticipation turned more to... apprehension.
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| Was able to dispense with my "book must have 20 good photos" rule halfway through book... |
The first thing that hits one upon opening Home Fires is the color palette throughout the entirety of the book. I remember Helen Levitt stating that in a perfect world she would be able to photograph in some perfect compromise of color and B&W. She wasn't particularly pleased with the end results of either medium. And I've seen my fair share of B&W/color hybrid attempts at image making and editing, analog and digital- all regrettably far short from appealing. And the reason I reference all these failed attempts and wishful thinking is simply because these photographs achieve what I had long considered not possible- photographic images that read and can be appreciated as both B&W and color. The color palette is that muted, the light that subdued, so I found myself appreciating these images both for their seemingly nuanced B&W tonal values, as well as their subdued yet emotive color.
The question being, how did Mr Haley pull it off? What manner of magic allowed him the perfect amalgam of monochrome and color, in camera, via software or both? Not being the technical maven by any stretch, I just wanted the most basic of insights... which is exactly what I got; "It was the color that was there, no more, no less." At first I was taken aback. Huh? Anytime I was in desert areas, the colors were like... super saturated! Then I got to thinking: how my color sense sucks, how Bruce Haley is a no nonsense, no artifice kinda guy, and... how the few times I was in the desert during the winter season, yeah, conditions were like- really grey, colors really muted. No long or involved explanation into the technical or philosophical needed, simple reality provided the key. Perhaps, if I hadn't been shooting B&W at the time, it would have hit me from jump!
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| Photo: © Bruce Haley |
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| Photo: © Bruce Haley |
Landscape photographers please take heed, you don't need exploding sunsets or 3D HDR vistas to make dramatic photos; the current trend to make every landscape (and/or street photo) look like a scene out of Avatar is neither necessary, nor desirable. These landscapes are stark, bleak, desolate- and beautifully so! But then, this is a photographer at the peak of his game, someone who can confidently point his lens at the most barren of vistas and piece together seemingly insignificant details into dramatic compositions which most of us would simply drive by on our way to photograph something... 'more interesting.'
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| Photo: © Bruce Haley |
That's not to say that more traditionally dramatic and sweeping scenics aren't included, they are. It's just that the lesson learned is how less, in skillful hands, can indeed be more. Many of the shots are downright apocalyptic, and if you think that's easy to achieve successfully when surrounded by desolation- how many shots were taken this past year of empty city streets trying to achieve just that, coming up like flat, boring shots of... empty city streets!
I'm currently in the process of donating my photobook collection to the Bronx Documentary Center and notified them that I would be holding on to a few at least temporarily- this one ain't going anywhere for a while...
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| Photo: © Bruce Haley |
Addendum: Almost forgot, the book is formatted so that there is one photo every other page on the right hand side. No randomly sized, erratically placed images bouncing all about and occasionally bleeding unto other pages! Uniform pacing and placing that let's you appreciate these well reproduced images- one of those things I'm comfortably conservative about.
Every once in a while (like this time of year), I start thinking of getting new editing software, proper software, grown up software- like the adults have (instead of the adolescent version I currently own, Elements 9 that came bundled with the computer back in the day). This most recently became apparent with the 2020 billboard photo I took recently- a backlit challenge (to say the least), that I've painstakingly improved considerably since first posting (even if the seams are still showing)...
Now, I'm not gonna subscribe to the cloud; shit, I don't even have cable. Capture One can be bought outright and is supposedly quite good, but am I gonna shell out $300 for the 10% of the pictures that me and my Elements have trouble handling? And whenever I do (attempt to) try a new software on a trial basis, just thinking of the heartache, trial and error involved in the learning curve alone induces catatonic shock! Besides, if I go the high end editing route, I'm then obligated to get a Q, a new wardrobe and a new job just to match and support my new lifestyle. You see where this road leads...
Is there a self help group for this?
Were you surprised when our POTUS: repeatedly urged violence at his own rallies, repeatedly flouted laws: concerning bribery, extortion and separation of powers? Were you surprised when he continued to state that the only way he would lose would be if the election was "stolen;" surprised when he insinuated that maybe he wouldn't accept election results?
Were you surprised by his childlike impulsiveness to personally attack and deride those that didn't agree with him; surprised that so many of this Law and Order President's closest friends, associates and advisors are outright felons and criminals? Surprised that a POTUS in the 21st Century would so actively honor and praise racist, Confederate traitors of centuries past? Are you surprised that over 100 of his followers, US Congressional legislators, still objected to election results... after the insurrection?
Are you surprised that I simply just don't have the time to list each and every single instance that this sad excuse of a President has made a mockery of simple truth and basic sanity for four long years?
Section 4
Before you start thinking Raffensperger some kind of all that, trans-political hero standing up to the powers that be- start thinking more along the lines of someone who just wants to keep his ass outta jail in the long term...
This is also very indicative of the kind of reporting you get from a mainstream CNN/MSNBC vs. an independent, investigative news source...
C'mon, give me a break guys!
-Donnie "The Dotard" POTUS
I don't know how many times I listened to that damn phone call- better than any stand up I've heard to date... and I still couldn't get enough. So I then listened to this poor schmuck of a Republican election official from Georgia debunk each and every one of Donnie's fallacious claims...
And I gotta tell ya- there's a wee small part of me that kinda believes that sometimes, sometimes Donnie actually believes his own bullshit!
Do listen to the call- the pressure exerted by Trump on a US official to knowingly commit an outright criminal act is nothing short of... astonishing (and by this President- routine). He's told a number of times that his data is wrong, that Georgia's current numbers are indeed correct- and he just bulldozes on through without the slightest consideration, insisting that: the numbers have to be wrong, they simply cannot stand, and they must be immediately changed! One can only imagine what it was like for the President of Ukraine- as well as countless others.
And speaking of Law and Order...
A lot, a whole lot- I think it's called... nervous laughter.
And, uhhh... they also do it- at night!
Remotely... Vicariously!!!
No, not CGI, not Stop Animation- they're real, doing their own thing. They just can't think- not yet....
