Thursday, October 6, 2016

It's Out, It's YUGE- And U Gotta Have It!

They said it could never be done, if you'd told me last October that this time, this year, I'd be putting out a book of color photographs... I woulda told ya, "You're as crazy as that lyin' Crooked Hillary!" But there ya go, after forty years of nothin' but the best in Black and White... here it is- 52 color photographs, and the year ain't even over yet! Least that's what they tell me- and I hire nothing but the best people to tell me. And like all my other products- it's absolutely Tremendous. Trust me!

You can get it hard cover, dust cover, soft cover; you can even get the economical ebook thing.* Better yet, get 'em all. Get 'em for your friends, your family, get 'em for Xmas- put it right next to the Bible, I read 'em both, trust me. And the truth is, I don't make a penny on any of 'em. It all goes to the cost of production- that's right, I don't make a single penny on any of this,** cause I'm the king of debt. I got all the money I need- that's why I can't be bought! That's why people love me; that's why when I call- they kiss my ass!
*Or just look at the free preview (don't forget to embiggen)- Foreword here.
** True.



My instructor at Trump University helped me write the above (if I could only tell ya half of what I learned there). Anyway, after a big row with Steidel over distribution rights (what a loser!), decided to switch publishers and go the independent route. Of course, going indie requires the acquisition of various designers, consultants, etc- and truth be told, that Tim Gunn guy really fell short on the cover and lay out, and Kanye's editing was, well...

So Blurb it was! Naturally, I had to forego utilizing the planned rare earth materials, and the paper stock would not be hand soaked and laminated in the sacred oils of traditional, indigenous tribes. Absent are the recently unearthed maps encrypted within the very images themselves, and the pages no longer fold out into various origami designs. No tickets, no menus, no ancient scrolls or other secret hidden extras so popular in today's most esteemed indie art photo books- just a bunch of pictures I took in the first half of 2016. Enjoy...

PS- In all seriousness, I've always viewed Blurb as the dummy for the book you really want to make. But it also provides... an easy opportunity for the public to view it online. Why is the printed version so ridiculously expensive? Because I picked their best quality paper; I first chose the cheapest variety, and the photographs looked like they were run through a desaturation filter- it really took all the joy out of looking at 'em in the first place! Best bet, get the cheapo online ebook, or better still- just view the damn preview online for absolute spankin' free...

PPS- Soon Come:  And to all those left clamoring- "What's all this color crap!?" Nay, even the ravages of Shingles can't prevent this oft rejected, seldom dejected and overwhelmingly under emerging photographer from presenting the first two volumes of Greatest Black and White Hits from the 40 year archives- well before The Golden Era of Trump. Stay tuned...

2 comments:

  1. Well done Stan! Canadian's are so boring it's almost impossible to get any decent street shots here. Maybe it's the cold weather.

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  2. Heh-heh... Yeah, could be. Actually, even NY and SF have gotten depressingly generic and gentrified.

    I was more than a bit surprised that I was able to cobble something together with just the "occasional" shooting of less than a year. A good part of that because doing post from color averages a good 15 minutes, as opposed to days and weeks with my B&W "restorations." BTW- two books of that coming out soon, one with people, one devoid.

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